VAYECHI 1998

In the Torah portion Vayechi, we learn how Jacob blesses his children.  He blesses them with a general blessing and also with an individual blessing based on each one's characteristics.  It says, "And he blessed each one according to his blessing and then he blessed them."  He blessed them that they should develop those qualities that they had, and also that they should lead moral and upstanding lives.  Each one of us is different.  Each one of us has different talents.  Some of us have photographic memories; some of us can sing; some of us are athletic; some of us are people oriented; some of us are thing oriented; some of us have the gift of gab, and some of us cannot open our mouth. We all know that we are different, and some of us are not born with the physical or mental characteristics to do any job we want.  I had a friend who was only 5’2" and was not going to grow any more, and he was sure he would be a basketball player in the NBA.  I had another friend who was 6’7", one of the few people I had to look up to, and he wanted to be a jockey.  Obviously, neither of these friends could fulfill their ambition.  I also had another friend who wanted to be a dentist.  He was a straight A student, a Phi Beta Kappa, but he failed the manual dexterity test and could not be a dentist.  None of us would want to go to a dentist who could not accurately drill our teeth or give a shot.
In today's life, more and more people are knowing more and more about less and less.  I am reminded of an incident I witnessed sitting in a doctor's lounge.  A famous surgeon came in and said, "Whoo, that was a close call.  If it would have been one tenth of an inch more, it would have been out of my specialty."  Each of us has particular talents that should be stressed.

Jacob, in this Torah portion, wanted so much to give the leadership of the Jewish people to Joseph.  In fact, if we look at this Torah portion we will notice that every time Jacob speaks to Joseph, the name Yisroel is used.  The word Yisroel stands for rulership.  It mentions, "And Jacob lived in the land of Egypt," and then it says, "They grew near the days of Israel to die, and he called to his son Joseph." We also learn, "And he told Jacob here, Tour son Joseph calls and Israel strengthened himself and sat on the bed/" Jacob wanted so much to give the leadership to Joseph, but finally he had to admit that Joseph was not the right man to get the leadership.
In the blessing to his sons, he uses four sentences to extol Judah’s virtues and to describe what is necessary for leadership.  To his favorite son Joseph, he devoted five sentences, but he could not give him the leadership because he knew he was not fit for the leadership. Joseph, it is true, was Viceroy os Egypt, but he was the number two man.  Pharaoh, after all, was the number one man Pharaoh made all the decisions.  Joseph may have made the recommendations and may have implemented all the decisions.  Even after Jacob died, Joseph never approached Pharaoh directly to get permission to bury Jacob.  He had to work through his courtiers.  He could not make big decisions because he did not have the authority.  He was a perfect number two man.  Many times it happens that when a boss retires and appoints his number two man, thanks do not work well.  We see that with coaching as well.  The number two on the staff will be elevated, but will not be able to do the job because he really does not have all the characteristics needed to be the leader.  He is a good number two man,

but not a number one man.  That was Joseph.  That's why in this Torah portion, the only time it mentions "Jacob said to Joseph" and not "to Israel" was when Jacob gave Joseph the double portion of a firstborn, but he did not give him the political or spiritual leadership of the Jewish people.  He wanted to, but could not.  According to the blessing that Jacob gave to Judah, we see what is required for leadership.
One, you have to be acceptable to the people you are leading.  You have to be able to relate to them and them to you and not feel you are difficult or standoffish.  That's why it says, "And Judah your brothers praise you."  That's why Adelai Stevenson could never get elected president and Dwight Eisenhauer, with his big grin and ability to empathize with the people, was an easy winner.
The second characteristic of a leader is that you have to have some ability.  You do not have to be the top of your class, but you have to have some knowledge.  Not all our presidents were outstanding scholars.  Ulysses S. Grant was even at the bottom of his class at West Point.  That's why it said, "that your hand should be on the neck of your enemies."  In other words, you have to be able to run a government.  Dwight Eisenhower was the commander of the Allied Forces in Europe.
The third characteristic is that you must be able to exercise mature judgment.  You cannot run off half cocked, or using poetic language, "He crouches, he lies down like a lion."

Reuben lost the leadership because he made rash decisions, flying off the handle because of petty incidents.  Nobody wants a leader who, without prior consultation and cool judgment, would take impetuous actions.  The country would end up in disastrous wars with such a leader.  Even in the shul, someone who gets mad and berates members, who does not have the ability to listen is not fit for leadership.
The fourth characteristic is that, "Like an awesome lion who can rouse them," which means that he can take criticism.  He will not fly off the handle because people say nasty things about him.  He is willing to take responsibility for his actions, even if they do not redound to his credit.  It is true, Judah did not know he was consorting with his daughter-in-law.  He thought it was a prostitute, but he did not try to cover up.  He admitted he was wrong.  He did not get mad when people criticized him, even unjustly.  One of the most favorite of all political tricks is to get your opponent so mad he loses control and then becomes so embarrassed that he never even wants to exercise leadership.  A leader must know how to bear criticism.  Joseph could not really empathize with his brothers.  Somehow he considered him too aloof, even thinking that after his father died he would take revenge on them. Joseph also did not reveal himself to his brothers before others, maybe because he was afraid of the criticism that would ensue from Pharaoh's court.  Jacob knew that it was Judah that had to be the leader, not Joseph, even though it pained him greatly, but he also knew that every one of his children had great talents and they should all develop their talents, even if they could not be the leader.  A person should always maximize their strengths, not

concentrate on weaknesses.  Many times parents make a terrible mistake.  They try to have their children concentrate on their weaknesses instead of on their strengths.  They force them to take all sorts of math when they are not good at math.  As long as they can add and subtract, that is good enough.  Jacob gave a general blessing to his children, but he concentrated on their strengths.  If a child is good at sports and not good at reading, buy him "Sports Illustrated".  Read with him those things that have to do with sports.  Concentrate on a child's strengths.  Allow him to develop what he is good at.  That will not only give him confidence, but will benefit us all.  IF a child is good at art, develop his artistic talent.  If a child is wonderful at building, teach him how to build things.  If we will concentrate on our children's strengths, we will do wonders for them.  Yes, they have to have a minimal proficiency, but the most important thing is to develop their strengths.
I am reminded of the story they tell about a boy who brought his report card home to his father.  The report card was all F’s.  His father said, "Son, I can tell one thing from this report card."  His son asked what.  The father replied, "Son, I can tell that you didn't cheat." All of us should develop our strengths.  If we will do this, we can create a society that is pleasing and strong and moral so that the Mashiach will come quickly in our day. Amen.