VAERA 1992

The Torah port ion Vaera begins with Moshe Rabbeinu being very despondent.  At the end of last week's Torah portion we learn how Moshe complains to G-d and how he says, "Why did you do bad to these people?  Why did You send me?  Since I came to Pharaoh to speak in Your name things have gotten worse for this people."  In fact, he complains that the people are accusing him of making him stink in the eyes of Pharaoh.  Things had actually gotten worse for the Jewish people.  Pharaoh no longer gives them straw to build the bricks, and we know that without straw the bricks will not hold together.  It will melt just like today concrete has to have steel rods.  What's more, according to the rabbis, they were not even allowed to gather together.  Before this they were allowed to gather together for religious services, to strengthen each other.  Things had gotten much worse for the Jewish people, and Moshe was very discouraged.

In this Torah port ion we learn G-d' s answer to Moshe.  It says, "And G-d spoke to Moshe and He said to him, if I am G-d."  In Hebrew there are two distinct names for G-d that are used throughout the Torah.  One is Elohim, which means the G-d of nature, that G-d who created the scientific laws of nature, and no matter whether you are a pious man or not a pious man you cannot flaunt these laws.  You can be the most pious man in the world but if you run in front of a fast moving car you are going to be injured.  Therefore, when we refer to the word Elohim it refers to the G-d of strict justice.  The other name, Adonoi, which we pronounce as Adonoi but which we really do not know how to pronounce, is for the G-d of relationships.  That is why there are two creation stories.  One talks about G-d, the G-d of nature, and the other that aspect of G-d who wants to relate to man.  G-d says, "I am G-d, the relater, and I appeared to Abraham, Isaac, and Jacob by the name of the nurturing G-d.  My name Adonoi I did not make known to them."  This seems a very strange answer.  What is G-d telling Moshe here, and why does Moshe accept this answer?  We know that each of the patriarchs found G-d in his own way, and that is why we have three patriarchs.  That's why it says, "And I picked two Abraham, two Isaac, and two Jacob," because each of them found G-d in a different way.  Abraham found G-d in nature, in the natural order of things.  He was convinced that there was a unity behind nature, that the world was not just filled with random occurrences, that the moon and the wind and the sun, he knew there was something behind all these things.  He saw patterns in nature.  He saw the laws of nature.  He knew there was a G-d in nature.  Isaac, on the other hand, found G-d in personal experience.  He had a personal sharp experience of G-d I know someone carne to me a few years ago and said, "Rabbi, I think I'm going to have to change my religion.  " I asked why and he said, "Because I had a personal relationship with G-d, a personal feeling that G-d came to me and we do not believe in that.  I said, "What do you mean we don't believe in that?  Who are the prophets?  Of course we believe in that.  Did you ever see 'Fiddler on the Roof'?  Tevye was convinced he was talking to G-d all the time and G-d was talking back to him."  Then we have Jacob.  Jacob found G-d in history, in the little events of his own life.  So there are three ways to find G-d.  We can find G-d in the patterns of nature; we can find G-d in an intense personal experience; and you can find G-d in the patterns of the small little events that happen every day.  The rabbis tell us that the paragon of the relationship between G-d and man is the relationship between a man and a woman.  Therefore, if we want to understand the relationship between man and G-d we have to understand the relationship between a man and a woman, and many times in the Torah the people of Israel are compared to a woman and G-d is compared to a man in that type of a relationship.  In fact, when we put on our tephillin every day we say, "I will marry you forever..."  and the seven windings stand for the seven marriage blessings.  If we look here we will see that is necessary for a relationship.  In order to have a relationship with G-d we have to find G-d in nature, find G-d in personal experience, and find G-d in history.  Of course, today all you have to do is pick up the newspaper and you can see how G-d is appearing to all of us in history.  Read the Book of Ezekiel and all His prophecies are coming true today.  Of course, we are called upon to help G-d.  We are called to make these prophecies come true.  G-d helps those who help themselves, and, therefore, we should all give to UJA and help Russian Jewry and help Israel and make sure that these prophecies truly endure in our day, that their fulfillment truly endures in our day.

If we look at the relationship between a man and a woman we will see that really they are composed of three elements.  First of all, you have to believe that the relationship is natural.  You have to believe that a man needs a woman and a woman needs a man and you are not complete unless you are married.  We do not believe in any alternative lifestyles.  You have to believe in the institution of marriage.  It is very difficult to persist in a marriage unless you believe in the institution of marriage because there are ups and downs.  It is impossible to continue with an education unless you believe in the value of the education.  Sometimes it is tough to pass those tests.  Sometimes you have setbacks.  Sometimes you have teachers you do not like.  The same thing is true in a marriage.  You have all sorts of problems and setbacks but you have to persevere because you believe in marriage.  You believe that that is the best possible state that a man and a woman can be in.

The second thing is, of course, that you have to have an intense personal experience, which we call love, but love is not enough.  Many times people come into my office in love, greatly in love, but a little while later their marriage has soured, one, because they do not really believe in marriage, or because they do not fulfill the third requirement, and the third requirement is that you have to constantly be doing things for each other.  It is the little things that you do constantly for one another that really count.  That is the history, the history of the relationship.  If are not there for each other, doing little deeds of kindness for each other, supporting each other, helping each other the marriage will not endure.  I know a man who used to work all sorts of hours who hardly saw his wife.  He saw his secretary 150 times more than he saw his wife, and, of course, you know what happened.  The relationship between him and the secretary flourished but not the relationship between him and his wife.  That's what G-d is telling us here in this Torah portion.  "Moshe, do not be upset.  There is a relationship between Me and the people of Israel.  They feel it.  They know it is there.  Maybe now in the history, in the events that are happening right now they cannot perceive it, so they do not know how I am there for them but I am there for them."  Of course, that was, too, the story of the plagues.  The plagues are divided into three parts.  You have the plagues against nature because slavery is unnatural, so you had a plague of blood.  Then you had a plague against the personal experience of the people, frogs, frogs in their soup, frogs in their bed, frogs in their stove.  Then finally you had the experience of just a little thing, the lice.  One lice you can deal with, two lice you can deal with, but when it is hundreds of lice it is impossible to deal with it.  With the second set of plagues you had a plague against nature, wild animals who arrived into the city and terrorized the people.  You had a personal experience, the personal experience of the cattle plague, which some rabbis say also afflicted human beings.  Then you have the third, boils.  One boil, two boils you can take but a lot of boils it is impossible to take.  The same thing goes for the last set as well, for the hail and the locusts and the darkness.  Darkness, a little bit, we can all take but darkness for three days becomes overwhelming.  So we see that in order to have a lasting relationship, in order to accomplish anything in life we first have to feel that it is the right thing to do.  It is right to get an education.  It is right to develop your abilities.  It is right to feel that G-d needs you and cares for you and is concerned for you.  That is why He created you.  Then you must have a personal experience.  When you are learning you must get some JOY out of the learning, a feeling of accomplishment.  When you are in a marriage relationship you must feel for the other person deeply, and then you must also have a history of kindness, a history of helping each other, of constantly being there for each other.  The same things is true if you are trying to get an education.  You have to study constantly.  You cannot just study a little bit there and a little bit there.  It does not count.  You will never learn anything.  So we see that Moshe' s despair was dispelled because G-d said, "Listen, Moshe, the Jewish people know that the only thing that they can have in this world, any type of true relationship is with Me, that the relationships with their spouses but the important relationship is with Me and they know it.  They have a deep experience with Me.  Right now they cannot see how I am doing them a kindness.  They cannot see how I am backing them up and supporting them, but they will."  When they plagues came, they certainly did see that.  So, too, we have to always realize that if we want to have enduring relationships we must have a belief in the institution of marriage, we must have a deep experience and love for each other, and we must also always be there for each other and do many deeds of kindness.

I am reminded of the story they tell about a farmer who looked out his window and he saw a truck come by.  A man came out of the truck and he dug a good sized hole.  A few minutes later another man came out and filled the hole.  Then the truck drove 50 feet and the same procedure was repeated.  A man got out and drilled a good size hole and another man came out and plugged the hole.  That happened four times.  The farmer was amazed so he decided to go over to the truck driver and ask him what was going on.  The man said, "Well, you see we are from the high beautification department, and the man who plants the trees is sick today."  The same thing applies to human relationships.  You need all three.  You have to believe in the institution of marriage.  You have to have a strong feeling for each other.  Finally, you have to be willing to support each other and help each other and do things for each other.  In every aspect of life we need these three things.  We need to have a belief in the institution, itself, a deep commitment to it, and also follow through with loving deeds of actions.  May all of us have such types of relationships and such commitment so that our relationships will flower and our commitments will deepen so the Mashiach will come quickly in our day.  Amen.