TOLDOS 1987

We begin the Torah portion Toldos by learning the geneology of Yitzchak and Rifka. It seems strange that we should have to start out this Torah portion learning their geneology. After all, we learned about it before. We knew Yitzchak was the son of Abraham, and, what's more, we knew that Rifka was the daughter of Pituel, the Aramite from Podamaron. Then it mentions something strange. It mentions that she was also the sister of Laban, the Aramite. Why is that mentioned at all? After all, when the Torah usually mentions geneology it mentions only a person's father or mother, but it does not mention the brothers and sisters and cousins and aunts. All it mentions is the father and sometimes the mother. Why does it here have to mention that she was the sister of Laban? What's more, we learn that Rifka had a difficult time conceiving. She was barren for many years. Both she and Yitzchak prayed that she would be able to have children, and then when she did get pregnant she had a very difficult pregnancy. It says, "And the children struggled together within her." And she said, "If so, why am I this? Why am I this?" And she went to inquire of the Lord. The rabbis explain either she went to the yeshiva of Sheim and Aber to find out what was happening to her or she went to Abraham, but the answer that she was given seems a strange answer. It did not say she had these difficulties because she had twins. Instead it says that G-d said to her, "Two nations are in your womb and two people should be separated from your innards. One people should be stronger than the other, and the elder should serve the younger." Why did she receive such an answer as this?
It seems to me that the whole clue to understanding this first section of the Torah portion Toldos is the question that she asked: "Why am I?" In other words, why me? Why have I been called upon to be the wife of

Yitzchak? She, of course, knew about Yitzchak's illustrious ancestry. She kanew that Yitzchak was the heir of Abraham, and that Abraham had a special message to give to the world, a message which was based on Chesed, on kindness, a message which said that you could only reach G-d through doing deeds of loving kindness. That was the best way to reach G-d. She knew all that, and she could not understand why she was chosen. After all, she came from a family of connivers and tricksters. She came from a family who would cheat people knowingly. If her brother, Laban, would have been a stockbroker when the stock market crashed recently he would have post or pre-dated the sales so he could make a fast buck. That is why it mentions here the geneology of Yitzchak and her geneology and why it mentions that she was the sister of Laban, because not only was her father a petty gonif but her brother also was known for his sharp business practices. She, after becoming the wife of Yitzchak, was barren for many years, and, because of this, she could not fulfill the promise that was given to Abraham that he would have children who would fulfill G-d's mission in this world. After all, Yitzchak was the son to whom this promise was destined to flow, and, yet, Yitzchak could not have any children if Rifka could not have children. After she became pregnant she had such a difficult pregnancy, and she said, why me? Why have I been chosen? Actually, according to many rabbis, the reason she received the answer she received was that she should rid herself of this inferiority complex. It was because of this inferiority complex that tragic things would happen in Jewish history. The rabbis say that when she first met Yitzchak she enveloped herself in a veil not just as a sign of modesty, but because she really did not feel worthy of Yitzchak. Of course, later on when we learn how Yitzchak was going to bless Esau instead of Jacob, instead of going to Yitzchak and pouring out her heart and giving her doubts about Esau (After all, that was her son and she loved him, too.), she

devised this strategem, this trickery, which, of course, worked but caused enmity between Esau and Yaacov. In fact, she, according to the text, probably never saw Yaacov after this incident. It was to counter this inferiority complex she had. Yitzchak made her feel insecure that she was told what she was told.
The rabbis tell us that Yaacov and Esau are really symbolic of the two Yaitzers that are in each of us. We have the Yaitzer Hara and the Yaitzer Tov, the good impulse and the evil impulse. There are two nations which struggle within each of us. Sometimes it seems as if the Yaitzer Hara is going to win, because the Yaitzer Hara is filled with passion and is always struggling forward and always seems to propel and push us. The good impulse seems more sedate. Yaacov stayed in the tents. It was Esau who went out further to hunt and into the field. Yaacov was a sedate person. Sometimes it seems as if our evil impulse will always overcome our good impulse, but it does not have to be. We do not believe, as some people believe, that man is born good and it is only the governments which stop us from being good, that if we would organize society correctly then man would flower in all his goodness. This is the idea, of course, of the Libertarians on the right and the Marxists on the left, but we know that is a false idea. Other people believe that humanity is damned and doomed and we are under the concept of original sin, that man cannot help but do evil. We do not believe that either. We believe man is born neutral, that you have two inclinations within you that you can master. The good inclination can control the evil inclination, and, not only that, but the rabbis say that the evil inclination is really a good inclination, that G-d, when He created, said it was very good. In fact, the Talmud says there were three good things created in the world: envy, the evil impulse, and mercy. We can all

understand why mercy is a good thing, but why evil impulse and envy? The rabbis explain because if there would not be an evil impulse, which is just another name for ambition and passion, then people would never build homes and get married and do anything. Therefore, it is a good impulse. We just have to be careful that it does not trample over things. Envy, of course, among scholars produces knowledge, and as long as it does not get out of control it is good. We have to compete but only within certain bounds.  It is good that there is competition as long as it does not lead to hatred or all sorts of immoral shortcuts in order to win. The important thing in life is to realize that each of us has bad thoughts many times. Each of us sometimes goes overboard. Rifka felt so insecure in front of Yitzchak.  She did not realize that Yitzchak, too, was a human being and sometimes he had unworthy thoughts and misconstrued things and got angry when he should not get angry even though he came from a very good family. Rifka had nothing to be ashamed of. In her environment she was a proponent of Chesed, of kindness, even though in her own family they were all self-centered and only interested in making a fast buck. It was because she was so insecure that she did not give Yitzchak credit for knowing that Esau perhaps was not worthy of the blessing. In fact, if we read the blessing carefully that Yitzchak gave to Yaacov when he thought it was Esau we will see that it is only a material blessing. The blessing of Abraham Yitzchak did not give to Jacob until he was ready to leave for Mesopotamia. That blessing of Abraham he never intended to give to Esau, according to the text. We see that because of Rifka's insecurity and inability to go to Yitzchak and present her case because she felt who was she in front of Yitzchak, therefore, tragedy happened to the Jewish people. None of us should ever feel inferior. All of us should feel worthy. All of us have many times insincere thoughts, devious thoughts, and even do devious things sometimes,

but we can control them. Our good impulse can control our evil impulse and direct it and allow it to flourish within the limits that it was meant to flourish in. That what "the elder shall serve the younger" means. It means that each of us has within us all sorts of ideas. Some are good and some are bad, but we can control them if we want. Yitzchak was not a superman, and Rifka was not a bad person because she came from the family that she came from. She was a good person. All of us should always take pride in who we are and realize that everyone has to struggle, and that if we have overcome our selfish urge and we have lived a life filled with Chesed we have done what G-d has asked us to do.
I am reminded of the story they tell about a Soviet gulag in which 3 people were standing talking to each other. One said, "Do you know I'm here? I was against Bulganim." The second said, "Do you know why I am here? I'm here because I was for Bulganim." The third said, "You know why I am here? I am Bulganim." It is not true that man is naturally good and it is only the government which stops us from being good, and it is not true that man is bad. Man is neutral. We have within us two nations that are constantly conflicting, but we can control them. We have this struggle whether we come from a good family or a bad family. None of us should ever feel inferior. We should always feel equal to the task, and, with G-d's help, we will always overcome and the good impulse will always control the evil impulse. May this be so. Amen.